We are no friends
by FromAnotherWorld
Summary: Oneshot: Wolf considers if he still hates Fox and if Fox hates him, but how could they ever forgive each other after all that had happened?...
1. Chapter 1

This is just a short story I wrote years ago. I changed a few things of course but basically it´s an old story of mine. The parts that are written in italics are memories so don´t get confused.

**We are no friends**

_My boot was pressing on his throat a trickle of blood streaming from the corner of his mouth making him strenuously pant for breath. He had destroyed everything, turned my life into a complete chaos but now he was lying to my feet gasping for breath with my boot sqeezing his throat. Revenge tasted so sweet and it was like a strange drug making me want more and more._

"Don´t get the wrong idea of me. We are no friends and we never will be!" Sometimes he just didn´t seem to know, ´cause he didn´t know half the truth. He knew me as an enemy and knew I had once yearned to kill him and yet what he knew wasn´t half the truth. Sometimes it seemed he hated me far too little ´cause he didn´t know about half the things I did.

But after all I never had said a word about it though I don´t know why. At times between waking and sleeping I had been wondering if I´d mind him know and hate me but I still don´t know and wouldn´t want to do.

Sometimes I also wondered if he´d want to know the truth but I strongly doubt he would and then at times I had ask myself if I liked the way things went but found no answer to this question too.

_It felt so good and I was so furious, so full of hate. He gasped, coughing almost suffocating in his own blood. I couldn´t remember to have ever enjoyed anything more than my final victory and taking revenge to the full brought me into ecstasies. I stepped even harder onto his throat watching him panic and struggle in futility to get free._

I once had believed to hate him and wonder if I still do but probably I don´t or else I´d not consider it, I guess. Also I wonder if he ever hated me and if he still does but maybe not I just can´t figure out why. It simply isn´t what he seems to do.

He was my enemy and had been since long ago but not since ever but I just don´t know if this matters anymore. Everything had been very different long ago but things had gone astray and I wonder if he still remembers or if I even care.

Yet things can only change in one direction and never will be like they once were. Thus he´d better not get the wrong idea about me ´cause we´re no friends and never will be though once we were but this was long ago and too many things have happened since then.

_Enraptured by his desperate struggle I only incidentally realized Leon´s and Oikony´s return being far too busy with my defeated enemy to take in much else. Pigma was already standing beside me wearing a broad disfiguring smirk on his extraordinarily ugly face. "Sorry, Wolf, we´ve lost that guinea pig." Leon informed me landing his Wolfen. I actually didn´t care about the rabbit. I already had achieved everything I had been craving for the past two years. "Never mind. Oikony, go inform Andross that we´ve got that fool." I ordered not letting any of it distract me from my revenge._

"Yeah – it´s understood, but still." Fox replied. No, he didn´t understand the slightest bit. If he only knew how much he doesn´t know he´d certainly think differently.

I wondered how much he did know and how much he didn´t, what he had figured out and what he believed but neither of it I said and simply responded: "Seems we´re stuck here for the time being."

Yet I didn´t know if I minded being forced to stay here with him for a while by external circumstances. "Hm, yes, seems we´re." he answered absently.

"Why´ve you been here anyway? Don´t you got more important matters to take care of?" I ask though I actually was quite glad he was here.

"We lack information about where the enemies headquarters are located. Thus all I could do was take out their base here and hope to find some clue of what´s actually going on here."

"Why are you being alone? Is your team doing something else or are they just being late again?"

"No we´ve split up for the time of that mission – and anyway they´re not all always being late and actually you´re here without your team as well."

"Well, I´ve heard your mates tend to be late – or at least one of ´em. Katina, eh?" I wanted to know.

"Um, yes. Why do you know? Is your team there as well?" Fox inquired his expression indicating he didn´t like this too much.

However, I didn´t share his concern about our teams accidentally meeting on Katina. Not that I could clearly have predicted how they would react to each other without the two of us being there but the worst thing that could happen was that a few ships would be shattered – this wasn´t too much of a matter.

Probably things hadn´t just changed once for now I see they keep changing but there were things that couldn´t change any more.

_Oikony shortly let me know he had understood but I was far too excited and high of victory power and destruction to pay any further attention to him. Meanwhile Leon was approaching us interestedly watching. I removed my foot from the fools throat and slammed it into his face. Blood was gushing out of his broken nose dripping to the ground dying the soil red._

"Yeah, they´re on Katina. I wonder how Leon and your birdie will get along with each other – if your birdie spoils it... – or is it rather Panther and your girl meeting up without you being there you worry about?" I inquired.

"Um, no, I´m not being worried, it´s just..."

"Well Panther had been looking forwards to meeting her again."

"Well, um, yes, I´m not too worried about that. I fully trust Krystal." Fox responded seeming a little uneasy.

Somehow I liked the fact that we were stuck here – in an odd way. It was strange. I almost thought... but that made no sense. We were stuck here and there was absolutely nothing proper to do but, though I didn´t have the first ides why, it was fine.

"That´s so typically you." I said smirking at him.

"Wolf, what are you talking about?" a confused Fox wanted to know.

"Well, um, yes." I quoted him, "You´re not worried but there are more ums than proper words. You sound a little ridiculous, ya know? Why don´t you try quit that?"

"Wolf, I am not, er, just forget it."

"You know, you really ought to do something about ´em. Ums don´t sound very manly, rather like a pathetic wimp, don´t ya think so?"

"Fine, are you finished?"

"You being offended? C´mon am just curious what you´re doing."

_He slowly rolled to the side spitting out some more blood with an agonized groan as I kicked him to turn him round. The miserable creature gasped in pain doubling up on the ground. I kicked him again and again making him first whimper then cry out in agony and vomit blood trembling in pain. As he lay almost motionlessly to my feet I drew my blaster aiming at his leg. For so long I had been yearning for revenge planning and trying with all my determination and now finally victory was mine and his worthless life was in my hands._

Sometimes I considered the pup rather pathetic and yet somehow I couldn´t despise him though I didn´t know why. Maybe this was because I basically knew this impression wasn´t true or maybe there was a completely different reason. There just were so many things I didn´t quite get and, to be honest, I never truly had tried to understand.

I guess I simply didn´t want to know. I wouldn´t think my own decisions over, would rather not understand my own reasons. It was easier this way.

"Were are you meeting up with your team?" I inquired to end the silence between us.

Fox shortly hesitated obviously considering something before he responded: "There´s an enemy space station close to Fortuna. We gonna go there."

"Seems we´re not gonna get in your way then. I´m heading for another place."

"You actually hadn´t been in my way here as well."

"´Cause there had been far more scum than either of us expected. Don´t think I´d have missed any opportunity to take you down otherwise. But now our ships are damaged."

"Yeah, sure." he replied absently. I knew he didn´t take me too serious but somehow I didn´t mind.

"Anyway, had been quite fun, though we´re wasting our time now." I noted.

_Leon was watching the scene with obvious delight and the broad smirk Pigma was wearing still distorted his repulsive face as I considered which part of James McCloud I wanted to shoot off. First aiming at his leg I moved my blaster up to his shoulder and then down along his back again. "Um, Wolf, remember, we had been ordered to capture him if possible. And if we finish him off now, it gonna be boring later on." Leon reminded me as I just had made my choice. He was right and there would be enough time to continue._

"Well, yes, but in a few hours that storm is gonna be over and we can leave. So this shouldn´t be any problem." he replied.

Usually it wouldn´t have been any problem to fly in that violent sandstorm out there but both our fighters had taken severe damage during the fight which made the whole matter a little more complicated and consequently we would be stuck in those ruins on Titania for the next few hours. Still things had worked out quite well.

However, I didn´t know if this mission would have ended that fine for either of us if we hadn´t met up by chance.

A few moments passed by in silence and I got bored again.

"You know what?" I ask.

"Yes, what is it?"

"Not only fighting you is fun. You had been doing quite well outta there, pup, ya know?"

"Um, well..."

"What about ums?"

_I put my blaster away again, roughly pulled McCloud to his feet and brutally twisted his arm to his back almost breaking his wrist making him gasp in pain. Blood was still streaming from his face seeping into his clothes or dripping to the ground and if I had let go of him I guess he´d have fallen down again._

"Yes, I know, It´s just – you are talking an awful lot and I don´t quite know..."

That was true. I was talking an awful lot and had no idea why. – just to kill time I assumed and because I kinda liked the situation.

"We´ve got an awful lot of time to kill and right now I prefer killing time to killing you." I explained startling Fox a little – damn, I really was talking a load of rubbish."

"U... I mean, fine, I prefer it this way too." Fox replied quite astonished.

Though considering it more closely I didn´t think I was too eager on killing him anymore and I was quite sure he knew. I just wondered why this changed.

But maybe I just had become to like our fights too much to want to put a final end to them and somehow I also had become to enjoy flying missions alongside him.

"Get that stupid look off your face pup." He still looked at me rather puzzled.

"Yeah, Wolf, just one thing. Is that the kind of conversation you are having with all your enemies?" the confused fox ask though knowing the answer

– No just with the enemies I like – I almost replied – But! Hey! Since when did I like him?!

_I continued handling him brutally while we brought him to the headquarters. Blood was still gushing out of his nose and dripping to the ground as I roughly dragged him through the corridors. He didn´t even find the strength to make a single attempt to pull free and even if he had done so every try would have been in vain._

"I´m not stuck in a fucking ruin with all my enemies, am I? And most of my enemies are no allies right now, are they?"

"No, well, they´re not. And I guess you don´t know them." he replied calmly.

This was true. We knew each other for so many years now – since I had been eleven I think. I might quite as well have been ten or twelve or any other age, it really didn´t matter.

He had always been a little wimpy in my opinion but in a way we had gotten along quite well, till I had told him a secret and that fucking idiot had run to his fucking dad. The most pathetic thing about it was, he hadn´t even seemed to realize what he was doing. And then my life had fallen to pieces practically in front of my eyes – yes I had had two back then.

"No, I don´t know them."

"Strange – the whole thing – isn´t it?"

"What whole thing? Your stupidity?" I replied with a cutting undertone. Yes, it was strange. My life hadn´t been shattered out of maliciousness or spite – it simply had been stupidity.

_Unchangedly pleased with the way things had gone I reached Andross´ `throne-room´ – or whatever it was – and pushed McCloud into it who stumbled and fell to the ground. "I see the mission had been successful." Andross who had been wanting to see McCloud defeated for his own personal reasons noted. "We´ve captured McCloud. Hare however escaped." I explained but assumed that Andross cared about that rabbit just as little as I did._

Fox backed away a little, as I stared at him aggressively, and looked at me matter of confused.

"Well, just everything... the past... now... the present."

"The past no longer exists, pup. It´s gone. Stop running after it. Nothing that is gone ever comes back." I didn´t quite know why I had said this. I wasn´t even sure what I was referring to. Maybe to the friendship we once shared, maybe to the things I had taken from him or maybe to something completely different. Maybe I was even telling myself to leave the past behind rather than I was telling him.

"No nothing comes back." He thoughtfully repeated my words a little sad.

Something about the way he said it made me feel slightly unpleasant even guilty but I pushed those feelings aside. After all I didn´t like him and I didn´t need to feel bad about anything I had done to him.

For a moment we were absolutely silent just looking at each other or into other random directions. I could tell that there was something going on in his mind and something about his expression made me wonder what it was. Then, after an eternity it seemed, he slowly opened his mouth to speak calmly and yet this calmness seemed strange, maybe too calm.

"May I ask you a question, Wolf?"

"_That won´t be of any importance." he replied, "Get McCloud up." I twisted the fox´ arms to his back and pulled him to his feet again. "What a pleasure to meet you. Did you really think you could just come here and destroy everything I´ve built up and developed?" Andross addressed McCloud who rose his head staring at the ape. "It´s not over yet, Andross. You will be defeated and pay for your filthy crimes – it just seems it´s not gonna happen today but there always is a next day."_

"Sure, what is it?" I answered in a rather neutral even slightly disinterested voice even though I suddenly found something about the whole situation rather alarming, I just didn´t know what it was until I heard what he wanted to say.

"There´s something I´ve always been wondering about. There was just never anyone who could have answered my question. It´s about something that happened fifteen years ago."

He took a moment to continue. My eye narrowed slightly intensely staring at him. Apart from that my expression stayed motionless, not my thoughts and feelings however.

"I wanted to know what exactly happened the day my dad died... you... were there, weren´t you"

"No, you don´t want to know." I replied harshly and turned away from him walking a few steps away.

For some moments I stared at the wall not wanting to see his expression. By saying nothing in particular I had already said too much.

"_Not for you, McCloud, not for you." the ape replied triumphantly. McCloud needed to put an obvious effort into talking calmly and spat out another mouth full of blood: "The day of your defeat is not far away. You may be able to kill me but someone will show up who will end your tyranny on Venom." "Kill you?" Andros replied: "I don´t think I will kill you yet. After all there´s so much secrete Cornerian information, I´ll lose if I simply kill you."_

"Wolf?" he insecurely ask. "You... have been there, haven´t you?"

Yes, I had... been there... what an euphemistic way to call it. I didn´t even know why I minded him ask so much. I didn´t know why I minded telling him. I didn´t know why I minded hurting him.

"Yes. I have been there." I coldly replied.

"Please, I need to know the truth." Now his voice sounded less calm. It sounded unsettled and it sounded hurt.

Slowly I turned round and looked at him again. He looked the same way his voice had sounded. Mine was calmer now, a little softer and tired as I slowly shook my head: "No, you don´t need to know."

For a moment we just stared at each other. He looked more determined now.

"Why tell me that I don´t want to know implying every reason why I don´t and then not tell me anything?"

I wanted to yell at him again and throw any insult at him that came to my mind but somehow I couldn´t. I wanted to pretend I dind´t care what I had done and how much it had hurt him but somehow I couldn´t.

"It would only hurt you." I said instead.

"I know. I know it will hurt me... a lot." he replied weakly smiling at me. "But I need to know. The past mightn´t exist anymore but at one point there´s just no way you can run away from it."

"_Go to hell! I´ll never tell you anything!"McCloud retorted. He pretended confidence and determination but the cold fear that gripped him was unmistakable. "You´ll never? Well, soon we´ll see if you are as loyal towards Corneria as you say." I had hardly ever seen the torture cambers but the few times I had were enough to know what was awaiting McCloud and knowing so gave me great satisfaction._

I sat down on one of the many stones in resignation. Fox slowly walked towards me and sat opposite of me on another stone.

"Please." he calmly repeated but I stayed quiet. Where should I start after all? What was there to be said?

Instead I simply eyed the blaster he had with him and a few questions came to my mind I had already ask myself today.

Did I still hate him? Did he still hate me or had he ever done? Did I mind him hate me?

But those questions soon wouldn´t be of any importance anymore, because if I talked now at least the second one would be answered with `Yes´.

Fox looked down now too at what I was looking at.

"Wolf." He started then slowly drew his blaster and threw it into a corner. "I don´t intend to... I just want to know."

Again I looked at his blaster. To be honest, I really preferred it to lay in the corner far enough out of reach.

"Alright. Then listen. I guess you already know the story till the point were Peppy and your father were separated?"

"_Powalski." Andross went on, "Are you taking care of this?" "With pleasure." Leon replied smirking maliciously. "Make sure he tells us all he knows and if possible I want to talk to him afterwards, so let him stay alive. You know the way." Leon nodded and I dragged McCloud out of the room. Pigma followed us but Oikonny went some other way after all he would have been of a too high risk of fainting, if he had stayed. Other than Leon I usually didn´t spend any time in the torture cambers but this time I really thought about making an exception._

He nodded and again I didn´t know how to continue.

"By the time they were separated your father´s Arwing had already been severely damaged. He told Peppy to retreat but decided to take Pigma´s fighter down before he would do so himself. Pigma´s Arwing had taken considerable damage too but by the time your father realized he had no chance anymore it was already too late to retreat. Another shot blasted one of his wings off and some systems of his ship failed. He lost control of it and crashed."

Alright, so that had been the easy part. What was coming next was more difficult to put into words.

"Pigma and I landed our fighters and found your father as he was trying to get out of his demolished Arwing. I disarmed him and dragged him out of his ship and..."

Damn, why was this so hard? I took a deep breath and lowered my eye not wanting to look into Fox´ face.

He waited patiently for me to talk on or maybe he simply knew he didn´t truly want to hear what I was going to say.

"and..." I continued, "I beat him up. He was vomiting blood and I just went on and on. Then we brought him to Andross´ `throne room´ and Andross was interested in a few things your father was supposed to know."

_Soon we reached the torture cambers and I dropped McCloud to the ground leaving him to Leon. I didn´t leave however. After all he had done I was craving to see McCloud suffer. I even thought of it as a just thing. And so I watched with satisfaction as McCloud was stripped naked and chained up. Leon took his time to prepare and fetch his tools and didn´t seem to be in a hurry at all. This would take a while that much was for sure._

Again I hesitated not daring to look up having to force myself to talk on: "You know what that means. We... tortured him."

Fox´ voice sounded broken and pained as he interrupted me: "Who tortured him?"

"Does it really make a difference? I was there. We all were there. Does it matter who watched and who did it? I captured him and I knew Andross would want him to be interrogated. I... even wanted it this way, so does it really make a difference?"

Though I didn´t look at Fox I could tell there were tears in his eyes. His voice and his breath told me.

"Leon? Pigma?"

"We all were there. None of us would have wanted it any different. I might not have had the knives and other objects that cut through his flesh in my hands but I still did it."

_I watched as Leon ask his questions and watched as McCloud refused to say a word. I watched as I heard the cracking sound of breaking bones and screams of indescribable pain. I watched as I saw blood spurt, skin burst open and flesh tear. I watched multiple sharp objects dig deep into his body and saw him cough for breath and wish to die. I watched for a long time regarding it as right without a second thought._

A small sound told me that fox was crying. I knew there were tears streaming down his face but I didn´t look up to see and just sat there in silence and stared at the ground.

"Did he die... throughout... interrogation?"

Oh, fuck, how should I explain? There were just so many things going on inside my mind that I couldn´t comprehend. So many things that I never knew and didn´t want to know. It gave me so many answers to the secret questions I had ask mystelf that I didn´t want to have.

No, I didn´t hate him anymore, I didn´t anymore since quite a while and yes I minded him hate me but this wasn´t avoidable after all that I had done.

But, yes, I still hated his dad and yet I went too far. I knew of many people who had shared his black fate just a few rooms away from me but still this was a different thing, it was because his slow end I had enjoyed. And yet I didn´t know if I truly regretted what I had done to him or just what I had done to his son.

"No, he... died later on."

_I stayed there for a long time enjoying what I saw. Only as time passed by I slowly turned my back on the whole scene and silently walked out of the room leafing the screams of excruciating pain behind. Maybe this was the first time that day I actually thought about what I was enjoying. This was something for Leon to do but not for me. Now it simply made me tired and yet I didn´t regret._

It was strange how this misery had started. All because of a simple mistake, all because of a young Fox who had trusted his father too much and had underestimated the importance of the things a friend had told him. All because I had been naive and all because he had been even more naive.

And thus I lost an eye and a life, and a friendship turned into hate.

Blind with rage I had hunted for revenge and overlooked what I still felt.

I knew he had never meant to hurt me, he simply hadn´t known any better but to me it had been the same.

And so we had destroyed each other simply because of a single sentence that had been said one or two times to often.

"So what happened next?" he ask though unable to stop sobbing.

Why the hell would he still want to know the rest and why would I still go on?

"It took quite a while till we had the information Andross had wanted."

_I walked to my dorm and sat down on my bed wondering what I truly felt. Yes, his death was satisfying to me and this I didn´t think was wrong but it hadn´t just been his death I had enjoyed. What I had wanted was revenge and it truly felt good but maybe not the way it should._

"And then?"

Why did I tell him? Why had I started to answer his questions in the first place? It only hurt him and hurting him hurt me. Why would I hurt the both of us?

I looked down at my feet desperately trying not to cry myself. It worked somehow.

Thinking about it, he hadn´t hated me till a few moments ago, till the time I had confessed what had happened fifteen years ago. And I didn´t hate him, so why couldn´t I have left things as they were. Why couldn´t I have continued to pretend the past no longer existed.

But it would have been a lie and it wouldn´t have changed anything for the better. Nothing could change for the better anymore.

What happened now was just another result of this single stupid mistake the both of us had made.

One stupid sentence said to often and it truly shaped our entire lives.

I just wondered what would have happened if I had never told him or if he had never told his father. I wondered who I would be now and who he would be.

But those questions would stay unanswered.

"And then?" Fox repeated as I didn´t reply.

_I couldn´t tell for how long I had sat there dwelling on the same things but a small knock at the door startled me out of my thoughts and I turned round to see Leon enter cleaned up by now. "You alright?" he ask. "Sure, you finished?" "Yes, took a while though, but now I´ve got all the answers Andross wanted." "He´s dead by now?" I wanted to know. "No, ´course not. Andross needs a guinea pig to experiment on after all."_

"And then he was executed."

Review


	2. Chapter 2

Originally I didn´t plan for this to have a second chapter. Well, as you can see there is one now though it´s quite a while ago I wrote the first. This story used to be rated M but I don´t see any real reason for this rating and have just been overcareful in the begining so it will be T now.

This chapter is written much like the 1st one only that it is written from Fox´s perspective. The parts in italics are memories much like in the first chapter.

**We are no friends**

Too many thoughts were roaming through my mind to comprehend. Too many emotions were turning them into a confusing painful mess to keep them bottled up.

I had ask after all. I had wanted to know and yet, though I didn´t regret finding out at last, there was this horrible pain that flowed through my entire being straight out of my heart.

Hadn´t I known it all the time? Hadn´t I expected it? But having heard it out of the mouth of someone directly involved and not being able to deny any aspect of the truth anymore was something totally different. It struck me in a way I couldn´t have prepared for almost like the fateful day Peppy had come back from this failed mission on Venom and told me my dad would never return. I hadn´t understood, hadn´t wanted to, and so I didn´t now.

The person who had once been my best friend and who was directly involved in my father´s death and torture was sitting only a few meters from me and I found myself completely unable to react.

We had been friends after all and then once of a sudden bitter rivals who had caused each other so much pain it was hard to understand how we ended up where we both were today.

"_You!" an enraged voice yelled. I turned round in shock. It was a voice I knew very well, we had laughed together, talked about secrets no one else knew and sometimes we had argued or quarreled, but I had never heard this voice like it was that day – never this furious, this full of plain hate. "This is all your fault!" "Wolf!" I gasped taking a step back._

No, I had never liked to fight him throughout all the times we crossed paths and laser fire. The horrible thing was that, in spite of all he had done, I knew deep inside that I was not one bit better, that I had done no less harm.

I had stopped to try to hold back my tears and doing so would have been absolutely pointless anyway. Some things were just too terrible to be able to push them aside.

Right now we were almost completely silent. Only our breaths, my sobs and the storm outsides were audible. The situation was even a little absurd. Usually there would have needed to come some snide remark about my wimpish behavior, that´s how it always had been, but now there was only silence. Not a single word was spoken, not a single insult.

Some part of me wanted to hate Wolf for what he had done but this felt as if I was denying my fault and I actually had thought I was better than that.

"_I... what has happened?!" I ask gapping at his blood-covered face. "Yeah, what has happened?" he repeated with an expression of hateful disdain contorting his face in a way I had never seen before. "Wolf, I didn´t mean to." I stammered taking another step back as he approached me. "You know what? I couldn´t care less what you meant to do and what you didn´t."_

Wouldn´t I have had enough reason to hate the person who hurt me the most? But his voice hadn´t sounded like it had during our fights. It hadn´t sounded like the many times he´d told me he wanted to be the one to destroy me – which he had done in many ways – there had been no hate in it now, no wish to cause pain and destruction.

It had actually sounded as if he was sorry and I knew he was and so was I.

Yet forgiving someone who might have tortured and killed my dad felt just as wrong as hating a friend for a conflict I had started.

I squeezed my eyes shut exhaling deeply. I knew I needed to make up my mind now. I had hoped to see clearer once I´d know the truth but the tears blurred my vision. How was I supposed to know what I felt when those things contradicted each other?

"Wolf?" I ask weakly getting no reply but his troubled breath.

"Wolf." I repeated forcing myself to look up.

"_Your eye!" I gasped in shock as he stepped into the light of a street-lamp revealing a dark bloody hole where once a lavender eye had been. His only response was a devious sneer as he watched the dismay and confusion on my face that gradually turned into cold fear. "Hope you´re pleased with what you´ve done." he hissed baring his teeth._

His head was turned away from me facing the wall. His eye looked hard and concentrated as if trying desperately not to display any emotion he might be ashame of.

I wanted to say something but I didn´t know what. There were no right words but only confusion, pain and yet some awkward relief because I knew the truth at last but nothing seemed sufficient to express even a small part of what was going on in my mind and I guess so there was nothing that could have explained what he thought at this very moment.

Insecurely chewing on my lip I looked at Wolf trying to figure out what was on his mind and what was on mine.

"I..." I started still not knowing what I actually wanted to say but somehow the silence that followed wasn´t even awkward.

I took a deep breath propping myself against the stones behind me. For a short moment I eyed my blaster I had thrown away before Wolf had started to tell me how my father had died. I felt no urge to go and get it.

"I... I did want to know. It´s better than still wondering about it." I finally brought out biting down on my lip hard enough to taste some blood.

"_No, you must believe me. I never wanted for any of this to happen." I pleaded stumbling another step backwards. There was too much confusion, dismay and fear turning my thoughts into a complete chaos for me to think of any proper reaction and most probably there wouldn´t have been any anyway. The person standing in front of me was a close friend but the way he looked at me wasn´t the way any friend would look at another._

Wolf didn´t turn round to face me but only sighed. Somehow I still felt I needed to say something. In a way I thought it might help to make all the confusion go away.

"It´s all so absurd. I wonder what would have happened if we had known." I considered talking at least as much to myself as I was talking to Wolf referring to decisions and mistakes that had been made much earlier.

I had destroyed our friendship and his life with a single sentence I had said unaware of the effects it would have on the both of us, unaware how much it would shape our entire lives.

"But we hadn´t known." he replied gruffly still not looking at me.

Yet, maybe I could have known if I had only thought about it early enough. I had known that Wolf´s parents had been doing some illegal job for Venom out of a lack of other options. I had known that he had been somehow involved too also out of a lack of other options so why couldn´t I have kept my mouth shut? It really wouldn´t have been that difficult to figure out what my words could cause.

But I hadn´t thought about it. When I had realized it had been too late.

"Some days truly change everything." I said making him finally turn round.

"Only for the worse, pup."

"_I couldn´t care less what you wanted either! Why would you care anyways?! Ain´t your fucking daddy just proud of his brat now?! Ain´t that exactly what you wanted?!" Wolf yelled at me. But this wasn´t what I had wanted. How could I have known what would happen? I shook my head in disbelief of what I saw. No, I´d never have wanted this to happen._

I nodded sadly. Yes, most things that struck one once of a sudden without preparation where bad things but then I closed my eyes and slowly shook my head instead.

Not everything of great importance that hadn´t been to be expected that had ever happened in my life had been bad – only most of it.

"No, it´s just... bad things happen so much more easily." I replied.

"So we conclude life is shit." Wolf pointed out one of the corners of his mouth pointing slightly upwards making me sigh.

"No... just sometimes." Life wasn´t so bad. The bad things that happened were not the main part of life they just sometimes interfered and disturbed it. And sometimes they did so more often than other times.

Life hadn´t been bad in the beginning and actually my life wasn´t bad now. I had Krystal, I had my friends but of course I had also lived through a lot of things that had been bad.

One could argue that all the shit that happens in our lives is what makes us strong – but it´s not that easy is it? Not only the bad things make us strong and sometimes they just break us down.

Wolf looked at me almost a bit amused though in a sad way.

"Still optimistic, pup?"

_I jumped back with a yelp as Wolf was standing only one step away from me anymore but there was a wall behind me and I only bumped my head. "Wolf, I..." I stammered squeezing my eyes shut with a groan as his knee thrust into my abdomen. I dropped to the ground without even trying to defend myself. It would have been pointless anyway. Apart from that trying to stop him hurting me would have felt wrong. After all I knew he was right when saying it all was my fault._

I shrugged my shoulders. Somehow our outlook on life had always been different. I had always tried to maintain a positive thinking and Wolf had always been a bit more skeptic towards life not always the way he was now, however.

Maybe this is because of where we came from. Till the day when my father had died the only time I had had to battle any real problems had been the time my mother had passed away. I guess Wolf had been less lucky. Not that one was lucky with both of his parents dead at a young age but there were ways of being less lucky. Apart from that Wolf´s parents had died early too, the day he had lost his eye and both was my fault.

"I guess there´s no point in giving up on life or on luck." I replied feeling a little stupid saying this in view of the tears that soaked the fur on my cheeks.

"I´m not talking about giving up, never, I´m just talking about being aware that it sucks." Wolf took his position clear.

"It doesn´t always and in a way it´s a matter of point of view." I explained.

"Oh, spare me that. We both know that it ain´t that easy. Right now you should actually know that you can´t always just decide everything is sunny and fine. You just gotta go on through all the shit."

_Doubling up on the ground I felt Wolf´s foot thrust into my belly and step onto me. "You killed them! You destroyed everything! I don´t understand why I ever trusted you! I don´t understand why I ever thought of you as a friend." Wolf yelled at me continuing to kick me. But him beating me up wasn´t what felt the worst. The worst thing was that I knew he was right._

"Yes and once you get out of the shit again it is fine." I reasoned.

"Till ya fall into the next heap of shit." Wolf pointed out.

"Then I guess it´s even more important to value the time in between." You couldn´t escape your presence and you couldn´t always escape your past but you could make the most of what you had and try to understand the pains of the past to maybe leave them behind one day. This was not about forgetting or denying but simply about finding a way to live. Not every story could have a happy ending – I was now more aware of this painful fact than ever – but even so it was important to remain positive or at least when the time to leave a piece of past behind came.

"How did we get to discuss this fucking shit?" Wolf wanted to know.

I shrugged my shoulders. I had no idea myself why we were talking about this. I guess it was just because I had needed to say something.

"I don´t know." I mumbled closing my eyes for a moment. "No in fact I had just been wondering why everything had to happen the way it did. It´s weird, isn´t it."

_Gasping for breath I tried to sit myself up against the wall spitting out some blood and twinkling some tears out of my eyes. My rips stung like hell and I couldn´t tell if the blood I was coughing out came from my mouth, my lungs or my stomach. Slowly I looked up at Wolf who was standing above me and glaring at me with an expression of hate that froze me inwardly. "I´m sorry. I didn´t know any of this would happen." I tried to explain though I knew how useless my words were after all that had happened._

"Weird? Suppose so considering that you should be quite furious now instead of talking awkward stuff." Wolf noted.

I should be furious? Yes, I knew I had more than enough of a reason to be but so did he. I nodded slowly.

"Yes... I guess I got a reason but... I´d be a fine one to complain." I replied lowering my eyes. I was aware of the mistakes I had made and somehow this kept me from feeling what I possibly should have felt.

"You... so how far into the past do you intent to go? You really ain´t gonna leave anything behind, huh?" Wolf wanted to know almost with a grin on his face.

"Um... look, it´s not like I couldn´t remember how all of it started. It´s not like I wouldn´t know why it started. It´s not like... I wouldn´t know the mistakes I´ve made. I´ve... actually... always been aware of it. That means always after I had made them." I admitted. Yes, it was time to talk all those things over. We had denies them for long enough and yet our decisions and actions had been based on them. Wasn´t that ridiculous and stupid. I had saved the Lylat System more than just once and jet it seemed most of the things I had done in my life had gone wrong. No, not too wrong, I loved Krystal and I had my friends, I certainly wasn´t unlucky, but somehow there were still a whole lot of wrong decisions and mistakes I had made and there was a whole lot of suffering those mistakes had caused.

"_You´ve always been stupid, pup, but that´s not an excuse." Wolf growled his sharp white teeth bared. Shaking a little I lowered my head and spat out some more saliva mixed with blood. "I know." I muttered being kicked in the chest once more backing away with a wince. "Your fucking dad killed my parents on Titania. I´m haunted by the police for absolutely no reason, so name me one not to kill you right hear and now." Wolf demanded with a merciless glare._

"So what are you getting at?" Wolf wanted to know.

"Just... I am sorry." I replied making him almost laugh at me.

"What´s so funny?" I ask in slight bewilderment. Somehow I couldn´t really make sense of his reaction but thinking it over I couldn´ really make sense of the whole day so that probably shouldn´t surprise me.

"Nothing´s funny, pup. It just ain´t what I expected to happen." Wolf replied trying to suppress another outburst of laughter.

"Well, I didn´t either." I admitted. "But... I know that many of the things I´ve done had been wrong and I know that stupidity isn´t an excuse." Saying those things was a lot easier than I would ever have thought. It was the most unexpected and probably weirdest conversation I had had in quite a while but somehow it was almost natural; apart from the things we were talking about it was almost like it had been many many years ago. But how could I believe this when in fact nothing was like back then anymore.

"I remember we had had that discussion before." Wolf noted in slight amusement. Actually it hadn´t been this discussion yet I nodded because he was right in a way. It had been the day our friendship had ended and turned into hate. Or rather only one of us had hated the other that day.

"Yes, but the mood had been a different one." I replied remembering his furious hate towards me.

_I stared at him in disbelieve and he glared back at me with no warmth in his eyes, nothing that would have shown he wasn´t serious about what he had just said. "Wolf..." I stammered "You wouldn´t..." "So that obviously means you know no reason." he growled pulling me to my feet by my collar and slamming me painfully into the wall. I turned away with a yelp as his fist connected with my snout making some blood gush out of my nose additionally to the blood that come from my mouth._

The last time we had had this discussion blood had been streaming down Wolf´s face and he had wanted to kill me in a furious outburst of hate. Yet I couldn´t exactly blame him after all he had found out that day that his parents had been killed by the StarFox team at that time while they had been doing some job for Andross and it had been me who had told my father where they were and what they were doing and he had lost his eye while fleeing to avoid being arrested. Considering all of this I definitely preferred things how they were today.

"Yeah, losing an eye doesn´t exactly better ones mood." Wolf remarked.

"And I guess having to flee and to leave ones life behind doesn´t either." I added. Only now it came to my mind that I had no idea where Wolf had gone after that day, where he had learned to fly, and what he had done in the three years before he had killed my father.

"I didn´t have to leave a lot behind that wasn´t dead anyway. And I didn´t go alone." Wolf explained as if it hadn´t been a big matter but of course it had been. It had been a big enough matter to make him yearn for killing me more than for anything else.

_Weakly I tried to loosen his grip on me and to push him off but I didn´t manage to free myself still avoiding to struggle in any way that could have injured him. In horror I felt his thumb slowly press into my throat making it hard for me to breath. He stared coldly at me till a distressed voice from behind distracted him and caught his attention. "Wolf!" Someone called as if in great relief to have found him._

"Well, you had to flee alone or not. Anyway where did you go?" I ask.

"To Venom of course. Where else could I have become a pilot being wanted for having worked for Venom. They sorta had a flight academy too. Maybe not as fancy as the Cornerian one but it was the best option I had." Wolf explained his voice sounding as if he thought I was stupid.

Alright, this made sense and it gave further reason why he had continued to work for Venom. Also apart from it having been the best chance to kill my dad and me he wouldn´t have had much of a choice.

I guess I had had it much easier. Till the day my dad had died there had been nothing unusual about my life apart from having a famous father and also afterwards I had been more lucky. Life definitely was easier being on the winning side and without having a bounty placed on ones head.

"And your reason to want to become a mercenary was to kill my dad and me?" I inquired.

"Kinda. Apart from that there wasn´t much else I could have done. I hardly managed to get to Venom. Look, I was fifteen, had no idea how life works and no money as I couldn´t return home to fetch anything without risking to be caught and so couldn´t Leon."

_Wolf turned round dropping me to the ground. For a moment I just lay there coughing for breath till I regained enough strength to look up and see what incident had saved me. A few meters from us was a skinny lizard I had never seen before who gave a distressed slightly disorientated impression and had bloodstains all over his shirt and red liquid covering his fingers. "Leon!" Wolf exclaimed the rage in his voice replaced by confused concern. "What happened with you?!"_

Yeah, that lizard had had to flee from law that day too. I had no exact idea why though and I never really understood why Wolf and he were friends. Wolf might have committed quite a few crimes and killed quite a few people in combat but he wasn´t insane.

"So how did you make it to Venom then?" I wondered.

"I knew there were some rebells on Titania cooperating with Venom. Leon and I traveled to Titania as stowaways. My father had been working together with some of them so I vaguely knew how to find them and it also made it easier to meet them without risking to get killed. Well, that´s how I got to Venom where Leon and I joined the flight academy. It´s not like I had an exact plan back then or any plan at all apart from wanting to get my revenge. Yet, suppose I did quite well even though you´re still alive." as Wolf spoke the last sentence he sneered at me hinting he´d still have to change that. I replied with a faint smile. It wasn´t like he´d kill me right now nor did he actually have any interest in doing so later on. I knew that and he knew that I knew. There was merely an awkward rivalry between us anymore he seemed to like a lot but the hostility and hate had almost faded away with time.

"_Nothing. That ain´t mine." the lizard replied motioning at the blood covering his shirt. "I´m just here to tell you I need to go and I won´t come back." he continued narrowing his eyes with a slight gasp as he realized the blood and the empty socket in Wolf´s face where once an eye had been. "What happened with you?!" he repeated the question Wolf had just asked him. I couldn´t make much sense of what was going on here unable to react in any way or take my eyes off the both of them._

"Yeah, sure but right now there´s still that storm going on outside and our ships are little more than scrap metal." I replied.

"It´s not like this was the last time we met in the air. There´s enough time, pup." Wolf said with a threatening undertone that somewhat lacked seriousness. I only nodded. I guess there was no way of avoiding future fights and as long as they didn´t have any deadly outcome I should be fine with it.

"Sure, Wolf, then till next time." I replied absently listening to the howling storm outside the old walls of stone that provided us shelter. It really was odd how we had ended up talking in those ruins by mere coincidence. Wasn´t life a strange thing? This day had started completely normally just like any other day and now... I just hadn´t expected this outcome.

"You´ll see. You know you are more than just a little careless sitting here with the person who wants nothing more than to kill you and throwing your blaster into the other corner of the room. If you always act like this it´s a miracle you are still breathing." Wolf noted producing an evil grin while trying not to burst into laughter.

"So why do I still live sitting here unarmed if that person wants to kill me so badly?" I wanted to know making him pause for a moment.

"Yeah, I guess I should find a reason now." Wolf mumbled looking down in thoughts.

"_He betrayed me. That´s what happened to me!" Wolf yelled turning towards me again for a moment to glare at me but then his attention returned to Leon. "I have to leave too. I just barely got away when I fled from home. There´s nothing left for me on this planet." Now Wolf´s voice didn´t sound halfway as furious as it sounded helpless and lost. For a short moment the hint of a smile of relief showed on the lizard´s face. "Where are you going?" Leon wanted to know._

This really was a lot like it had been many many years ago. It was surprisingly similar; surprisingly natural almost as if all the hate and rage had never existed, almost as if we had never grown up, never fought in a war on opposite sides, never caused each other all the sorrow and pain. It was hard to comprehend because we clearly were no naive children anymore, we had fought each other multiple times and we certainly had caused each other more suffering than anyone else had caused us. Yet I almost felt as if I was back in the old days before our friendship had fallen apart, before my father had been killed and before Wolf and I had carried out multiple fierce dogfights. How could this be? The things we had done were nothing that could just be forgotten. How could I pretend this situation was normal?

"Oh, shit." Wolf growled "There ain´t a reason but that this fucking storm is still going on and I´d probably be bored to death if I had to wait here on my own. As I value my life I therefore have little choice but to killing you later on. Makes sense, huh?"

"Yeah, sure, it makes a lot of sense from a crazed ones point of view." I answered with a faint smile.

"Hey, no insults, pup, or I might reconsider it and take the risk of dying of boredom." Wolf threatened me.

"_I don´t know." Wolf replied. "Anywhere. Anywhere where they won´t find me." "So am I." the lizard said obviously more hopeful now. "You in a hurry? ´Cause I still got something to finish here." Wolf ask him turning towards me with a furious snarl contorting his muzzle. "Sure go along. I got time." Leon replied leaning against a wall with a mixture of a sneer and his previous confusion on his face. I backed away as Wolf went towards me and tried to fend his foot of with my arm as he kicked for my face._

"I guess I´ll have to take that risk then." I replied. "Have you realized what we are actually doing here?"

"Talking a lot of nonsense." Wolf shrugged.

"Yeah, a lot of pointless childish nonsense as we used to do." I considered making him faintly glare at me.

"That doesn´t mean anything is how it used to be back then. I told ya we are no friends." Wolf put clear much more distant that a moment ago much more how he had been towards me the in the past years. I only sighed listening to the wind outsides or rather trying to do so as it was only now that I realized there was no wind.

"No of course not but it´s also not how it used to be during the Lylat Wars, is it?"

"No, not like during the Lylat Wars either." Wolf admitted.

"Do you hear something?" I wanted to know.

"No what should I hear. I hear your voice."

"Exactly there´s nothing else to be hard."

"_Wolf, I am sorry but there´s nothing I can change anymore." I yelped as I was painfully kicked to the ground. "Yup, then you should have thought about that earlier." Wolf hissed at me but paused as the sound of sirens grew audible in the distance. "Wolf, I think I changed my mind. I am in a hurry." Leon said looking at him urgently and turning to leave. For a while I remained shakily lying on the ground gasping in relief as the both of them disappeared into the night still unable to comprehend what had just happened; unable to comprehend what I had done._

"I think the storm is over."

Thank you for reading my fic.


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